Dear Magnet:
I spoke with your office manager, Mike Ockishard concerning this situation. Although he said less then kind words about you personally, he was agreeable to conducting a full search for the Lean Pockets ("LP") and vowed that he woudl not rest until said yummies were recovered.
There is a possibility that they are being held without proper refrigeration. I know that your strange moral standards would be offended by this. Mr. Ockishard offered to provide you with his left over Cheetos for Friday's Lunch.
Please respond.
